Killers: 3.5/5

We hooked Netflix up to our tv via PS3 so I’ve finally decided to watch some of the 77 movies in my instant watch queue. Skipped a whole list of critically-acclaimed flicks to choose Killers, starring the always-adorable Katherine Heigl and the super dreamy Ashton Kutcher.

I’d describe the movie as an attempt at Mr. and Mrs. Smith as a comedy, except it wasn’t incredibly comedic. The general gist of the plot is that Ashton Kutcher plays Spencer, a former professional assassin who falls in love with and marries Jen, played by Katherine Heigl, and leaves the assassin business. They live wonderfully (I assume) for three years before Spence gets a message from his old boss (played by the crabby assistant principal in Sabrina the Teenage Witch).

Long story short, there is a $20M bounty for killing Spence and suddenly everyone in the couple’s life is trying to kill them. Turns out it was Jen’s dad (Tom Selleck, who I always confuse with Burt Reynolds because of the mustache) who put out the bounty on Spence because Spence’s old boss went bad and was planning on killing Jen’s dad. Or something. The plot was kind of silly.

The thing that saved the show was the charisma of Kutcher and Heigl. They’re both great characters and quite charming, plus Ashton Kutcher spent some time with his shirt off and, as a heterosexual female, I enjoyed ogling him. They did what they could with the mediocre, predictable plot. And that’s what gave the movie as good a rating as it did. I may actually watch it again because of Kutcher and Heigl. Maybe.

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